One of the first principles of economics I eagerly learned as a college student (many years ago) is that everything comes with a trade-off. Christmas undoubtedly seems to amplify the year’s “firsts” and “lasts,” wins and losses. I’m en route to Massachusetts where I’ll meet my first great nephew and celebrate his very first Christmas! And yet I’m choking back tears thinking of driving up to my childhood home, greeted by the wooden cross and manger my dad constructed shortly before his last Christmas. Grief is the cost of love. Longing, the cost of daring to hope. Winning and losing, the results of joining in on the game. 

And this is exactly what Jesus chose for us. To demonstrate the enormity of his love, he endured the sting of grief. To fulfill the longings of our hearts, he acquiesced to rejection and ridicule. To attain victory, he relinquished his power and status, and by all appearances, looked like he had failed at his mission. But we celebrate Christmas in the shadow of the cross—the symbol of both suffering and salvation. As my dad used his hammer to drive those nails into the wood of the crucifix and the cradle, he had no idea that in a matter of months, he would meet the very One who was willingly born in a stable, and allowed nails to be driven through his tender flesh. The One who chose us. 

Jesus allowed himself to weep at the death of his friend Lazarus, knowing that soon after he would celebrate raising him back to life; showing us that we too are permitted to mourn all of the heartache this world holds while we celebrate the miracles all around us. So, as Christmas approaches, remember that the King of the Universe chose to step into our joy and our pain. Not asking us to cloak our wounds by focusing on blessings, but instead, just as he modeled, to embrace the dichotomy. The One who made us and chose us, became God with us, to show that grief and sorrow can coexist with joy, celebration, baby giggles and hysterical laughter. So let yourself be with it all, as you receive the embrace of our Savior’s outstretched arms.